I Love You So Much It's Killing Us Both
- £11.99
- Pre-order
- Paperback scheduled for publication on 13/02/2025
- Page count: 336 pages
- ISBN: 9781914391446
Synopsis
Meet Khaki Oliver, a woman perennially trying to disappear: into a codependent friendship; an ill-advised boyfriend; the punk scene; or simply, the ether. These days, it’s a meaningless job and an empty apartment.
Then, after a decade of estrangement, she receives a letter from her former best friend – Fiona’s throwing a party for her newly adopted daughter and wants Khaki to join the celebration.
Khaki is equal parts terrified and tempted to reconnect. Their platonic love was confusing, all-consuming, and encouraged their worst impulses. While stalling her RSVP, Khaki starts crafting the perfect mixtape—revisiting memories of formative shows, failed romances, and the ups and downs of desire and denial—while weighing the risks and rewards of saying yes to Fiona again.
One song at a time, from 1980s hardcore to 2010s emo, the shared and separate contours of each woman’s mind come into focus. Will listening to the same old songs on repeat doom Khaki to a lonely life of arrested development? Or will hindsight help her regain her sense of self and pave a healthy path for the future?
Set in the suburbs of Los Angeles and New York City I Love You So Much It’s Killing Us Both is a Black woman’s coming-of-age story, chronicling a life-changing friendship, the interplay between music fandom and identity, and the slipperiness of sanity.
About the author
Mariah Stovall has written fiction for the anthology Black Punk Now, and for Ninth Letter, Vol 1. Brooklyn, Hobart, the Minola Review, and Joyland; and nonfiction for The Los Angeles Review of Books, Full Stop, Hanif Abdurraqib’s 68to05, The Paris Review, Poets & Writers, and LitHub. I Love You So Much It’s Killing Us Both is her first novel and 24 Hour Revenge Therapy is her favorite Jawbreaker album. She lives in New Jersey.
This book can be found in:
More books published by Influx Press
Influx Press is an independent publisher based in north London, founded by Gary Budden and Kit Caless. We are committed to publishing innovative and challenging fiction and creative non-fiction from across the UK and beyond.
Subscribers Perks
Join Good Book Club from as little as £10.83* per month and enjoy exclusive member perks – like unlimited free delivery across our site.
Good Book Club is a book subscription that makes it easier for you to indie books the mainstream tend to ignore.
Exclusive member perks:
- Free and unlimited delivery across our bookshop.
- A brilliant newly-released book from an indie publisher delivered every month.
- Free access to author events online and in-person.
- Monthly extras you actually want – like signed copies and notes from authors.
Got a questions? See our FAQs.
*Price is for annual subscription.
Membership will auto-renew every month (if you choose a monthly membership) or every year (if you choose an annual membership) beginning on your enrolment date, using your selected payment method.
Added to book bag
1 items | £